Church On Cumberland Road
by obsessedwithstabler
Summary: We've been rockin' all night, but don't you know? You gotta get me to the church on Cumberland Road!


Hehe, due to the encouragement and threats, here's my newest Mike songfic, Church On Cumberland Road. I won't say what it's about, but I will say that there is some partner abuse and a few dirty words. You've been warned! The song I used is Church On Cumberland Road, by one of my favorite groups, Shenendoah. Enjoy, and please remember to review!

Disclaimer: I said I'd be happy to take 'em off Dick's hands for a while, but he said no... dang it!

This little songfic is dedicated to Confused, Infinity Star, Podie1, and LoganBarekfan for all their kind reviews. Thanks!

Mike Logan groaned as the sun shone down on him, burning through his eyelids. He fumbled around for the warmth that normally resided beside him, and when he didn;t find it, he finally opened his eyes and looked around at his surroundings. He was lying on a couch, and he noticed two other lumps on the floor.

Stretching lazily, he happened to catch sight of the clock on the wall, and panic set in when he realized why he was on the couch, and what time it was.

"Damn it!" he yelped, startling the two lumps on the floor. He leapt off of the couch, tripping instantly as the blankets that were tangled around his lanky legs caught him by surprise. He landed on his knees and elbows, and he reached out and smacked the closest lump, making it stir and moan. "Get up!"

Bobby emerged from his cocoon blanket, stretching his big frame slowly. "What's it, Mike?" he groaned, earning him a pillow to the head.

"We're late!" Mike shouted, finally pushing himself to his feet.

Bobby bolted upright and shook the covers off of himself, then shoved Lewis, who was still sleeping. "Wake up, Lewis," Bobby said, pushing at his shoulder.

Lewis stirred and sat up slowly, looking around the living room in confusion.

"We're late," Bobby announced, rising to his feet. Mike stumbled around the apartment frantically, muttering to himself while Bobby calmly went into the kitchen and made coffee.

Finally they all took turns getting their tuxes on, and just as Lewis was walking out of the bathroom, a sharp knock sounded on the front door. "You guys had better not be sleeping, or it'll be all your asses!" Jimmy Deakins threatened through the door, and Bobby quickly let him inside.

Dressed in a tuxedo and being the authority figure that he was, Deakins glared at the men and ordered, "Okay, get your butts into gear and move it!" None of the men dared argue with him as they all trooped out of the apartment.

Deakins, Mike and Bobby squeezed into the front seat, while Lewis sat in the bed of the old Ford truck that Deakins had brought. "Let's go!" Mike shouted, and Deakins shot him a look as he gunned the accelerator, gravel flying as they sped out of the parking lot.

CICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICI

"Where is he?" Carolyn wailed, pacing around the parking lot of the church. Alex saw her and darted over as fast as she could in her high heels and dress.

"Car, honey, he'll be here," Alex murmured comfortingly as she guided Carolyn back into the church. "They're probably just fixing their tuxes or something like that." But in her mind, Alex was planning on how to disembowel both Mike and her partner and still get off on a justifiable homicide.

Carolyn just shook her head and hugged Alex, wondering where on earth their partners were.

The guests were beginning to arrive, and soon the ceremony would start, and the groom and two of the best men were missing! Carolyn began to cry again, and Alex cursed Bobby and Mike for making her best friend cry on her wedding day. And not good crying, either.

CICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICICI

"Hurry!" Mike muttered, and Deakins glared at him again. "I'm going to be late for my own wedding!"

"And knowing our partners, Carolyn's probably crying, and Alex is thinking of the most painful ways to kill us both," Bobby mused, and that made Mike even more nervous.

They passed other blurs that were cars, and Mike covered his eyes with his hands and groaned.

_Just about a mile off of 109 _

_There's a little church sittin' back in the pines_

_I promised that girl she was gonna be mine _

_I wouldn't be surprised if she was standin' there cryin'_

_Whoa, I didn't know a board-out Ford could go so slow _

_Whoa, you got to put your foot down on the floor _

_Yeah we've been rocking all night, but don't you know?_

_You gotta get me to the church on Cumberland Road_

"This is what you get for staying out all night!" Deakins growled as he narrowly avoided clipping a black SUV. "You get hung over and lose track of time, then you're late for your own wedding!"

Mike looked over at Bobby, who had his head hanging out of the window, and he said, "It's not just me they're going to kill. It was Bobby's idea to have a bachelor party!"

"And it was your idea to bring the beer!" Bobby shouted in his own defense. Mike leaned forward and stared at the road ahead of them, then glanced at his watch.

"Come on, Jimmy, I thought you said you could drive!"

_Lewis is passed out in the back, but I think he's alive _

_Bobby's got his head hangin' over the side _

_Here we are doin' only ninety-five _

_What's the matter with you, man? _

_I thought you said you could drive!_

_Whoa, I didn't know a board-out Ford could go so slow _

_Whoa, you got to put your foot down on the floor _

_Yeah we've been rocking all night, but don't you know?_

_You gotta get me to the church on Cumberland Road_

Finally Deakins swerved the truck into the parking lot of the church, and Mike and Bobby coughed on the exhaust fumes as they jumped out of the truck. "Let's go, Lewis!" Bobby shouted, and Lewis climbed out of the bed of the truck, stumbling and looking green. "Shake it off, man!"

Straightening their tuxes, the four men ran into the back of the church, quietly walking through the back doors. Alex spotted them first, and she calmly walked up to them.

Bobby stepped forward and smiled charmingly at her, saying, "Uh, Alex, sweetheart? You look beautiful."

She smiled pleasantly, then punched him dead in the arm as she hissed, "Where the hell have you idiots been?" The men looked down at their shoes, and she smacked Mike, saying, "You made her cry on her wedding day, you asshole! What've you got to say for yourself?"

Just then the processional started, and Mike quickly walked down the aisle, up to the alter, and breathed a sigh of relief once Deakins and Bobby joined him.

Alex and two other women appeared to stand across from them, and Bobby shuddered as Alex smiled venomously at him and Mike.

Finally Here Comes The Bride began playing, and Mike took a deep breath, then looked down the aisle. His heart jumped in his chest when his eyes settled on his bride, and he knew that he had done nothing more right than proposing to Carolyn.

She smiled at him as she stepped up and stood across from him, and the preacher drawled, "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today..."

_Sweeter than the dew on a honeysuckle vine _

_Warmer than noon on the Fourth of July _

_Cutest little girl that I ever have known _

_Waitin' at the church on Cumberland Road_

Shouts of "Congratulations!" and "Good luck!" could be heard up and down the road as the limousine pulled out of the church parking lot, and Alex smiled at Bobby, who returned the smile nervously.

"Are you going to kill me?" he asked, wringing his hands, and she shook her head and reached up, wrapping her arms around his neck as she pressed her lips to his.

"Not here. Too many witnesses," she purred against his lips. He gulped nervously, and she smiled again and patted his cheek. "Now, if it had been our wedding, well..."

He shut his eyes and shook his head, not even wanting to imagine how furious his diminutive wife would have been if he had been late for their wedding. Truth be told, he had been looking to avoid that, and had wound up at the church nearly two hours early. Shaking his head, he leaned over and pressed a kiss to the top of her head, hoping to quell her hormone induced emotions.

"Come on, Alex. Let's let the both of you home," he murmured against her hair as he gently rubbed her slightly swollen belly. She sighed and shook her head, then allowed him to lead her back to their SUV.

What a day it had been┘

_Whoa, I didn't know a board-out Ford could go so slow _

_Whoa, you got to put your foot down on the floor _

_Cause we've been rocking all night, but don't you know?_

_You gotta get me to the church on Cumberland Road_

_Hey, we've been rocking all night, but don't you know?_

_You gotta get me to the church on Cumberland Road_

The End!

A/N: Hehehe, okay, now that ya'll have read it, leave a nice little review for me, please, and I'll see ya'll again soon!


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